TV in the Middle East
Have you ever recalled enjoying a television program even when you didn't understand it? Worse yet, did you feel that not understanding it was the very key to its entertaining character?
Granted, the word entertaining is a dubious expression not everyone would bestow on certain programs. One you don't have to understand and still read about everywhere in the world is Al Jazeera (translated: 'The Peninsula'), the world famous news channel that even the US Air Force could not resist bombing. In a supposedly flagrant violation of the Geneva Convention, Al Jazeera has drawn fire for showing the dead bodies of English and American soldiers. They have been virtually the exclusive outlet for Bin Laden's Funniest Home Videos, which more powerful nations like the US don't find funny at all. People here get into very heated discussions what Al Jazeera really is. The Isrealis say it is anti-Jewish. Some Arabs here claim it is a Jewish front. Others a CIA plot. But they still all watch it. It wouldn't be fun watching a train wreck if you didn't get to see the impact and the bodies afterwards.
Though a staple for any Arabic television set, Al Jazeera is nothing I would call extraordinary. True, it may be sensationalist from time to time, but that’s something I would not mind on occasion from our ratings-lusting western media. And no, Britney Spears’ latest divorce proceedings don’t count here. So Al Jazeera is biased? Cry me a river the size of the Nile. What then is Fox News? I have never seen anything like Fox News. Here you have a roundtable discussion of views that reach from the right... all the way to the far right. Even more surprising than watching the Arabs with all of their kings and sultans watching Al Jazeera is a democratic republic like the US watching Fox News.
What is entertaining is channel surfing. There are hundreds of channels I can receive on satellite, fifty of them with solely religious content. I don’t know. Maybe it’s just me, but do we really need fifty of these television channels? Allah oo akbar. Click. Next channel. Allah oo akbar. Click. Next. The prophet Mohammed. This one’s in English. Click. These people are making the televangelists in the US look modern and moderate by comparison, not to mention sane.
Then there are the Arabic soap operas. Okay, I don’t get the point of these. Here, touching, kissing, and hugging is not allowed. Wait a minute, this is a soap opera? Say it isn’t so. No hugging. No kissing. No touching. On a soap opera. I have an idea. Why not play soccer without a ball, and the players can pretend they’re kicking it? Of course you would have to do away with the referee, which would be folly as the first argument will take up the entire ninety minutes of the game.
Player : The ball was in.
Goaltender: It was not.
Player : Yes it was. You never even saw the ball.
Goaltender: And neither did you? You shot it somewhere near the floodlights.
Player : No I didn’t. My teammate is bringing the ball back to midfield now.
Goaltender: (holding up his hand)
Player : What’s that?
Goaltender: I’m red carding you.
Player : You can’t do that.
How about creating the news without any headlines? We’ll sit and watch the news anchor silently gaze back into the camera sipping a soft drink. I still have to scratch my head over that one. What could be the draw of a soap opera that will show no skin? Extremely witty one liners? The singing and dancing? Does the last word of every reply rhyme with that of the question? Do the sponsors of these shows promise everyone who watches free hummus? Just what is the appeal?
Then there's the soap opera featuring warrior tribes that could hark back to centuries ago (or yesterday, who knows?). I still forget the name of it. Although there is definitely some basis in fact here, it does not show the Arabs in a very flattering light, no matter which tribe is fighting. If the West saw this, they wouldn't think it was a soap opera at all. Nice job, Arabs. The West couldn't have stereotyped you any better. Again, I don't have to understand a word here (and I don't) to find it even mildly entertaining.
As a Peace Corps Volunteer in Morocco, I used to watch Egyptian movies with my family. Again, I didn't understand a word, but some of the scenes were just so cliched, so banal, almost vaudeville to be taken seriously. I feel the same way today, no matter what I watch on Arabic TV. How little has changed in the years since. They might want to pipe down on censorship, for starters. That might do the trick.
Granted, the word entertaining is a dubious expression not everyone would bestow on certain programs. One you don't have to understand and still read about everywhere in the world is Al Jazeera (translated: 'The Peninsula'), the world famous news channel that even the US Air Force could not resist bombing. In a supposedly flagrant violation of the Geneva Convention, Al Jazeera has drawn fire for showing the dead bodies of English and American soldiers. They have been virtually the exclusive outlet for Bin Laden's Funniest Home Videos, which more powerful nations like the US don't find funny at all. People here get into very heated discussions what Al Jazeera really is. The Isrealis say it is anti-Jewish. Some Arabs here claim it is a Jewish front. Others a CIA plot. But they still all watch it. It wouldn't be fun watching a train wreck if you didn't get to see the impact and the bodies afterwards.
Though a staple for any Arabic television set, Al Jazeera is nothing I would call extraordinary. True, it may be sensationalist from time to time, but that’s something I would not mind on occasion from our ratings-lusting western media. And no, Britney Spears’ latest divorce proceedings don’t count here. So Al Jazeera is biased? Cry me a river the size of the Nile. What then is Fox News? I have never seen anything like Fox News. Here you have a roundtable discussion of views that reach from the right... all the way to the far right. Even more surprising than watching the Arabs with all of their kings and sultans watching Al Jazeera is a democratic republic like the US watching Fox News.
What is entertaining is channel surfing. There are hundreds of channels I can receive on satellite, fifty of them with solely religious content. I don’t know. Maybe it’s just me, but do we really need fifty of these television channels? Allah oo akbar. Click. Next channel. Allah oo akbar. Click. Next. The prophet Mohammed. This one’s in English. Click. These people are making the televangelists in the US look modern and moderate by comparison, not to mention sane.
Then there are the Arabic soap operas. Okay, I don’t get the point of these. Here, touching, kissing, and hugging is not allowed. Wait a minute, this is a soap opera? Say it isn’t so. No hugging. No kissing. No touching. On a soap opera. I have an idea. Why not play soccer without a ball, and the players can pretend they’re kicking it? Of course you would have to do away with the referee, which would be folly as the first argument will take up the entire ninety minutes of the game.
Player : The ball was in.
Goaltender: It was not.
Player : Yes it was. You never even saw the ball.
Goaltender: And neither did you? You shot it somewhere near the floodlights.
Player : No I didn’t. My teammate is bringing the ball back to midfield now.
Goaltender: (holding up his hand)
Player : What’s that?
Goaltender: I’m red carding you.
Player : You can’t do that.
How about creating the news without any headlines? We’ll sit and watch the news anchor silently gaze back into the camera sipping a soft drink. I still have to scratch my head over that one. What could be the draw of a soap opera that will show no skin? Extremely witty one liners? The singing and dancing? Does the last word of every reply rhyme with that of the question? Do the sponsors of these shows promise everyone who watches free hummus? Just what is the appeal?
Then there's the soap opera featuring warrior tribes that could hark back to centuries ago (or yesterday, who knows?). I still forget the name of it. Although there is definitely some basis in fact here, it does not show the Arabs in a very flattering light, no matter which tribe is fighting. If the West saw this, they wouldn't think it was a soap opera at all. Nice job, Arabs. The West couldn't have stereotyped you any better. Again, I don't have to understand a word here (and I don't) to find it even mildly entertaining.
As a Peace Corps Volunteer in Morocco, I used to watch Egyptian movies with my family. Again, I didn't understand a word, but some of the scenes were just so cliched, so banal, almost vaudeville to be taken seriously. I feel the same way today, no matter what I watch on Arabic TV. How little has changed in the years since. They might want to pipe down on censorship, for starters. That might do the trick.
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