The first thing that you will notice about Jordanians, or Arabs in general for that matter, is that they are very soft spoken. It is quite possible that this is the only place where you will require an ear canal aid to understand people, even though your hearing may be perfectly in tact. Sure, you will hear people hawking their wares at the souk or the oddball yelling out something on the street. Other than that, you have to wonder how they stage street rallies. They could march right through my backyard and I probably still couldn’t hear them.
Then there’s the call to prayer, of course. Considering that microphones or bullhorns didn’t exist back in the day, you have to wonder how they determined who was going to perform this magnificent vocal feat. And just how would they make him call out? Would he be sitting over a fire? Would his testicles be hooked up to jumper cables? Just wondering. Thank God for today’s technology. That obviates the necessity for any unnecessary torture.
Now in our neighborhood there is a mosque that works like any other. Five times a day you will hear the mudir belt out the call to prayer through the megaphone, the faithful proceed to the mosque on the double, and one step closer to paradise is achieved.
Only this mudir does it with a special twist. In the earliest a.m. hours, two or three o’clock, I’m not quite sure, you will hear the customary call to prayer followed by a low chant in a voice that would make Freddy Kruger sound like the sweetest soprano from the Met in New York. I am assuming it is something from the Holy Koran, and the voice sounds more in tune with the low, soft voices of Arabic men. But dang, that sounds scary. The locals understand perfectly what he’s saying. But if you’re a foreigner or a tourist you have to wonder. Is this a cue to hide in the basement? Will the entire city self-destruct at the end of the message? Is this their answer to the verses of Revelation? I’m not sure I want to know.
Another notable regular voice in our neighborhood belongs to somebody making his rounds riding in a truck every day. It’s a steady bark through a megaphone, and to this day I am not sure what the guy wants. Some people have suggested that he is selling various items or is offering to purchase old furniture or the like. I have no clue, only that this too sounds a little intimidating. What if he is pointing out our house to extremists? What if he is offering to sell a blowtorch to facilitate the razing of our quarters? What if he is ordering people to off all Americans? Worse yet, what if he is ordering people to raze the whole town? Again, I’m not a person who frightens easily, but this part-time rapper makes me at least think.
I have to chuckle every time I’m working at the airport. I have tickets that need to be handed out to some of the passengers, which requires a loud voice to call them. Not going to happen with any of my men. You might as well ask them to boil their first-borns in oil. Sometimes I even wonder if they can hear themselves. And what do the babies do here to be heard? Do you build in microphones in their chest cavity after birth so they can be fed? Again, just wondering.
Imagine an Arabic quarterback under center barking out the signals, thousands of people hollering in the stands. Forget it. This will end either tragically, with that quarterback literally buried on that football field following dozens of offside penalties, or the linemen will just have to adhere to a silent count. Don’t ask me what they would do in case of an audible, though.
I will say it is quite refreshing to have people around you who don’t feel like they have to yell and holler to get your attention. There’s nothing wrong with a little humility in your voice. Maybe people just don’t like noise here, which I find unlikely. The honking horns and loud music blaring at any time of the night suggest that they can make noise artificially where their own nature has failed them. I would only discourage radicals (even their own here) from staging any uprising here. You almost have to wonder how wars ever happened in this area.
Then there’s the call to prayer, of course. Considering that microphones or bullhorns didn’t exist back in the day, you have to wonder how they determined who was going to perform this magnificent vocal feat. And just how would they make him call out? Would he be sitting over a fire? Would his testicles be hooked up to jumper cables? Just wondering. Thank God for today’s technology. That obviates the necessity for any unnecessary torture.
Now in our neighborhood there is a mosque that works like any other. Five times a day you will hear the mudir belt out the call to prayer through the megaphone, the faithful proceed to the mosque on the double, and one step closer to paradise is achieved.
Only this mudir does it with a special twist. In the earliest a.m. hours, two or three o’clock, I’m not quite sure, you will hear the customary call to prayer followed by a low chant in a voice that would make Freddy Kruger sound like the sweetest soprano from the Met in New York. I am assuming it is something from the Holy Koran, and the voice sounds more in tune with the low, soft voices of Arabic men. But dang, that sounds scary. The locals understand perfectly what he’s saying. But if you’re a foreigner or a tourist you have to wonder. Is this a cue to hide in the basement? Will the entire city self-destruct at the end of the message? Is this their answer to the verses of Revelation? I’m not sure I want to know.
Another notable regular voice in our neighborhood belongs to somebody making his rounds riding in a truck every day. It’s a steady bark through a megaphone, and to this day I am not sure what the guy wants. Some people have suggested that he is selling various items or is offering to purchase old furniture or the like. I have no clue, only that this too sounds a little intimidating. What if he is pointing out our house to extremists? What if he is offering to sell a blowtorch to facilitate the razing of our quarters? What if he is ordering people to off all Americans? Worse yet, what if he is ordering people to raze the whole town? Again, I’m not a person who frightens easily, but this part-time rapper makes me at least think.
I have to chuckle every time I’m working at the airport. I have tickets that need to be handed out to some of the passengers, which requires a loud voice to call them. Not going to happen with any of my men. You might as well ask them to boil their first-borns in oil. Sometimes I even wonder if they can hear themselves. And what do the babies do here to be heard? Do you build in microphones in their chest cavity after birth so they can be fed? Again, just wondering.
Imagine an Arabic quarterback under center barking out the signals, thousands of people hollering in the stands. Forget it. This will end either tragically, with that quarterback literally buried on that football field following dozens of offside penalties, or the linemen will just have to adhere to a silent count. Don’t ask me what they would do in case of an audible, though.
I will say it is quite refreshing to have people around you who don’t feel like they have to yell and holler to get your attention. There’s nothing wrong with a little humility in your voice. Maybe people just don’t like noise here, which I find unlikely. The honking horns and loud music blaring at any time of the night suggest that they can make noise artificially where their own nature has failed them. I would only discourage radicals (even their own here) from staging any uprising here. You almost have to wonder how wars ever happened in this area.
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