The Police Loses…again
There are always letters in my inbox written by faithful blog readers who congratulate me on the life I've chosen, questions about how people get gigs like this, you are blessed, you should be canonized, how does llama meat taste? etc., etc., etc.
I have a standard answer for wanna be escape artists. Yes, we are blessed. Yes, getting to know new cultures is wonderful, as is the travel and the lower cost of living. Yes, being a worldchump is wonderful.
That said, life is not different from where you are living back home. Life here is routine, whether you are in Melbourne, Australia, Hamburg, Germany, or Santa's toy factory on the North Pole. And every now and then, we need a real kick in the tail to be reminded that life can actually be worse at times.
Enter the caballeros, the gentlemen from the law enforcement community, also known as the cops. Last week on Monday, Liebi drives to work after dropping me off. When she takes a left turn to head towards her building, she is passed on her left side by a speeding vehicle that ignores a double yellow line. Long story short, the jackass plows into the left backdoor, right where Axl would be sitting if this were a family outing. The little dwarf jumps out and hollers at Liebi, although it is not understood what is said. Liebi calmly contacts the guards at her place, they accompany her to the police to file the report, and she is free to go back to work.
Meanwhile, some genius back at the police station decides it was 100% Liebi's fault. Funny. The only way you can be 100% at fault is if:
1. You were drunk (Liebi passed a breathalyzer test)
2. You plowed into a parked car.
3. Somebody bribed the cop.
I doubt very much that the reader will need two guesses as to what happened here. The little dwarf bribed the cop, and presto, he bought himself the conviction of an innocent person. Bravo, policia. You sucked before, but I suppose at less than 150 dollars salary per month, you will have to supplement that income anyway you can, eh? And this despite the fact that the accident had actually been filmed by the security cameras inside her building. In other words, it's like you telling me there isn't a sky despite the evidence pointing to the clouds, sun, stars, airplanes, and that big blue blanket up there.
Eventually, Liebi gets the last laugh. The police report arrives at her desk, and she refuses to sign it. Take that, you little gnome. See if you can get a good lawyer to argue your way out of this one, because he'll have to go to the Ministry of Foreign Affairs to do so. Good luck. Meanwhile, I am assuming the accident captured on film will also be sent to the Ministry. I'm guessing that police bribe went for nothing in the end.
I have a standard answer for wanna be escape artists. Yes, we are blessed. Yes, getting to know new cultures is wonderful, as is the travel and the lower cost of living. Yes, being a worldchump is wonderful.
That said, life is not different from where you are living back home. Life here is routine, whether you are in Melbourne, Australia, Hamburg, Germany, or Santa's toy factory on the North Pole. And every now and then, we need a real kick in the tail to be reminded that life can actually be worse at times.
Enter the caballeros, the gentlemen from the law enforcement community, also known as the cops. Last week on Monday, Liebi drives to work after dropping me off. When she takes a left turn to head towards her building, she is passed on her left side by a speeding vehicle that ignores a double yellow line. Long story short, the jackass plows into the left backdoor, right where Axl would be sitting if this were a family outing. The little dwarf jumps out and hollers at Liebi, although it is not understood what is said. Liebi calmly contacts the guards at her place, they accompany her to the police to file the report, and she is free to go back to work.
Meanwhile, some genius back at the police station decides it was 100% Liebi's fault. Funny. The only way you can be 100% at fault is if:
1. You were drunk (Liebi passed a breathalyzer test)
2. You plowed into a parked car.
3. Somebody bribed the cop.
I doubt very much that the reader will need two guesses as to what happened here. The little dwarf bribed the cop, and presto, he bought himself the conviction of an innocent person. Bravo, policia. You sucked before, but I suppose at less than 150 dollars salary per month, you will have to supplement that income anyway you can, eh? And this despite the fact that the accident had actually been filmed by the security cameras inside her building. In other words, it's like you telling me there isn't a sky despite the evidence pointing to the clouds, sun, stars, airplanes, and that big blue blanket up there.
Eventually, Liebi gets the last laugh. The police report arrives at her desk, and she refuses to sign it. Take that, you little gnome. See if you can get a good lawyer to argue your way out of this one, because he'll have to go to the Ministry of Foreign Affairs to do so. Good luck. Meanwhile, I am assuming the accident captured on film will also be sent to the Ministry. I'm guessing that police bribe went for nothing in the end.
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